Asks an interesting question...

"I'm just peppy!"

Lucky guy. 'nuff said.

Learning to be a stripper? Here's a tip: Make sure you have a good grip on the pole.

The Top 99 Most Desirable Women is an annual list compiled by the readers and staff of AskMen.com, ranking the females that have been collectively deemed the year’s most alluring. 2.5 million reader votes were cast for the 2006 version of the list, which will be read by millions more worldwide.

... is not here. I don't have any pictures of Jessica Alba naked. I don't have any pictures of Jessica Alba in a bikini. And I don't have any pictures of Jessica Alba in a thong. Stop asking. If I did have pictures of Jessica Alba naked, in a bikini, or in a thong, I certainly wouldn't share them with you. In fact I'm quite sure Jessica Alba has never even been naked at any time in her life. She was born fully clothed in a snowsuit. She never wears bikinis - she wears a burlap sack to the beach. I know for a fact that Jessica Alba does not even know what a thong is.

Stop asking. Now here's a picture of Jessica Alba showing off her camel-toe:

So apparently there's this event going on right now, something to do with some kind of game in which grown men kick around a little ball on a field, and bajillions of people go crazy. And apparently this game in no way whatsoever involves beautiful women in a state of undress. And yet here they are.